ABOUT STORMALIZA IN HER LIFE FROM NOW ON 

Hi, I pray to God all of you will be my friends. But I have to be true day because today I make a choice in my life to A Man name Johnny B. I thought he die because he in a truck accident to drive things for the war on Iran. Johnny was in his truck & the truck in front of he exploded that is only thing I know from people say to I not really sure on things happening because not see it for real & he lost things in past to no can remember things or his own Mom. But his love for me is strong. JB soul remember me. I understand as A Mom, this is very hard to live with, to get her son to remember her, but last time she called me saying his kidney fail and I thought he die because they never call me back until today. I love him so much my heart is his. I am sorry if people think they will have a future in my life $ yes you can as a friend to be friends to make us as family to co-workers & etc, to nothing much more. It be a honor to meet you some day as a friend to making this world in our lives so special to grow as a family God wanted us all to do. But to the hearing people in this world who meet me as a person when you first see me, Can you Please say Hi, then go from there on things in life to be in my world to really see me. Because it is in your hearing world way of live not mine. Because it is your world. So I wait for you to come in my world to meet me first & if you say hi cool & me say hi to nice to meet you. Then you know to see me as a person me is not see me as body as for sex to take my body and clothes off to do what you wish then go but in my eyes this is so wrong but me not able to fight in this body & I try to do the best me can in hearing world of different cultures in this body me live in &if I say come in, you can, But others I not see things right in the hearing way of life to enter a person home people at my door walk in to do things they want is wrong but they do it and me not able to stop it but when I can I do and if person listen to see me as me cool but alot of times people see different things on me to hi sex now by. is wrong but they do it & I happy they go to me not talk to them no more or let them know to be with hearing woman to their world and it is cool to do and for me to be safe in this world. It is all I can do to say it but they walk in my home first not say & just doing things in their hearing world way or come to work in my home to doing things their of life to way to moving my things around my home to no ask me, to just do what they want to do. I sometimes ask what you doing? They talk in there way of live to me have to play sherades of reading lips to figure out what they say lucky if me right and if not I ask them to write so I know in words I know to things they do in my home. But a lot of times people not see me. yes see body first to take what they want, to touch me fast on parts of my body to diferent places they want to touch with out my say. I am scare so I watch them touch me & my life is about touch. But if I say no & you keep doing you rape me with out my say ok. That is wrong & the people who do this I just try hard not to hurt them & feelings so I no get more abuse from them. Plus I let it oh to not see them no more. This is ok with me. But if I see you again I do tell the person true and let it go. I not able to stop people on things to this body because I am not able to do things like other people can do. I try to be independent with a caregiver in my home & with my son and they know how to touch me to not hurt body on the things of disabilities are in this body of my soul I live in to me say when they can touch me. I can say in voice for hearing world way of life. I try to read lips to reading body language to help me figure out the word someone trying to say to me. But I do see you in person of body not the soul only when you make time for me to know it is cool on what you doing but I not know what to say. I know not to hit people first, so I not get abuse back. I had to much of it now & no want no more. Please can you be nice & knid to me Please. I and body hurts of inside to different things in body to make it life on this earth ok. But some times people think I can hear them. It is so funny to watch things they do to see it but when they drop things yes I feel it in my whellchair to different things in the world to feelings cars, big when is motorcycle to deasel trucks go by my home yes I feel them big time but when not noice things to feeling it yes it scare to big time to sometimes me jump. But there is other times me jump when body inside so heavy to strong pain to hard to do things. That is when I have to stop to relax so body calm down and yes I feel people walk by me to say bad words I some times see to try not to read it to feel hurt when they not talk to me right as a person me is. Because when I not hear them to answer them back, it is not my fault. Some people get mad at that on me to go crazy to being the mean person they are or they just not see me is why they treated me that way. So next thing me feel is that person hit me because I no stop to say hi. I am sorry but I see your body just busy to things I have to do in live for other people need me to do.  I did not hear you because I am deaf. Plus not all time pay atenttion to feel you around me. To no can hear a sound in your hearing world. Some times when people go by I feel them to a cold breeze to their body odor to a lot of things to different things in life. But if it is to things my is allergic to will make my body feel like someone on side to hold on my tbes to breathe to sharp pains in body to asthma attacks But I thank God our Father for putting in in someone soul and their body make it with other bodies to help so I can have it in my home to a machine to help me beathe again. But if not help I make sure to get appointment to doctors but on the ride me lucky to how I can get there and back home. It is cool when people see me to see I not hear them. So they look at me face to face to me can see them to say hi. Or to where they check to see if my is deaf to me watch them say, you deaf? Then me smile yes me deaf. Nice to meet you, or They point to the things on my electric wheelchair that make them smile to ask if it is for sale. I say no, it from different people give to me where if they want to put it on or I do & some Times I buy or people give to me so they have the honor of riding with me on my wheelchair every day of my life I live in this planet called earth. It is so cool to meet them. With my electric wheelchair this way I see sad faces turn to smiles, people light up, people want to touch and they do  plus children walk by to hit it or to see if it fall off to get it and me laugh because I know it on there to stay. To me say hi to them so they see me see them to & some I get as a friend. But hope to make a big family here on earth. It is so beautiful to see what I can see. Me is half blind to & wear contacts to glasses. But if glasses not on me to only the contact people need to be close so I can see them, but not all time can it is very hard to see to vision things to real or on things God shows me sometimes when people see me or me not see good because contacts have to much dust & things on it wear at times I have to clean them to see if I have to contact cleaner to clean to then contact drops to help me put them in my eyes to see people or what is around me. The contacts with glasses can see a little better but the diiferent glasses I have are for different things. One pare is for to see a little far but no can see close up. I pare is for near to no can see far. So I see what the glasses let me see in the life of body I live in.  I miss a lot of things because I no can hear them but if see then I say or let someone know then I pray hard to hoping on voice to their hearing world way I say right word. but Alot of times I say words to mind faster then  on voice to use it and they come out wrong in the hearing world then me see action first to all different things people do to hit, smile, laugh, cry, mad, walk away from me to anything I no can stop on what happens But some times not ok & other times that is ok. I am person, So this is me to you & yes me is very different from this is why you have to come into my world first to talk to me not talk to me in your world. Becausemy life is & culture is deaf. A SILENT WORLD VERY DIFFERENT. I not can hear it this is why I have to learn words, me learn different things in my life to different cultures life plus travel with my son. There are times Christopher travel with out me in his life to. As a Mom I let him travel to hearing family to learn they way of life to help him out of trouble but not all time trouble to problems in life I not understand but it the hearing world of life I not will to live it only deaf disable way of life to my disabilities in  one body I live on this earth with my soul & with God & Jesus to my brother. If I not can say word only to words I can remember to say. If I say word to what you trying to tell me and you no hear the word it will let you know I not get that word this is why I not able to say it back to you. ok. Yes on things to learn to make mind grow yes I learn. It is so cool to make mind grow to knowledge & wisdom God he gives us plus things I learn from books to men and different people to live in this world to let my soul know what it is to picture in life to building plants to grow to design clothes to make to write peotry to song to people can sing my words to the world & other things like that to events, meetings, conferences, just to see that one thing you all need me to see to help you in this world as you help me to live in this body God are Father put me in but Man to different people cut up body to take things out to try new things in your world. Sorry the implant not work so I could hear you all now body inside show doctors to why they have to take out of my body and now me is me to just doing life to live in the world with you it is all I can do ok. It is up to you if you wish to be with me to try to make beautiful things to watch to see how it goes to good & bad, I know it will be ok when it happens. some times I dothings not not know what me doing until me do it & other things God do to me soul with him laughing to watch body do it and other times body not do because doctor cut it out and it not grow back in. Other times I need my son or friends to help me in my life that is so cool to have plus thanking IHSS to SSI to things in body to culture I have to live in. If they no do then I try to meet people who can do to help me, to get it done, on things God say to do. Plus I try to help give people to help me do things other people told me I have to do to live in this world. Boy All I can say is WOW BIG WOW. But I make a promise to JB from now to His Mom that from today on my body & soul is for only him. To other people in my life to no can see me in person to really meet me as a person not as a sex toys to play with Please not do it again. OK, BECAUSE YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE AND WHAT YOU DID & IT STAY WITH ME IN MY LIFE TO GOOD & BAD THINGS YOU ALL DO TO WHEN YOU MEET ME IN YOUR WORLD OF LIFE YOU DID NOT SEE ME, YOU TOOK ME TO THINKING IT OK TO DO & NOT ASK ME OR SAY HI IN MY SIGN LANGUAGE FIRST.i ALWAYS LET PEOPLE KNOW THAT OUR WORLD IS DIFFERENT BUT YES WE DO LIVE IN THIS EARTH WORLD BUT PLEASE WHEN YOU REALLY MEET TO SEE ME AS DEAF DISABLE CULTURE ME IS MAKE IT THE RIGHT WAY OF LIFE I HAVE TO LIVE IN NOT THE SAME AS YOUR WORLD OK. In person I no want people to hurt me or them to thinking me to be there because I answer message on computer ok. I only want you as a friend to nothing more. I Show true me to people but not all time they really see me but a lot of timesthey think they see me but yes in their world of life they do see me just diferent way on that one Or they talk to my son Chris or Elise, my son he signs to me in my sign language & Elise writes because she not know all signs, but she do when she wants to. Other times she talk so fast I laugh sometimes but miss the word or word all together like what just happen to me in her world of life to me have to work hard to figure out the word she saying, sometime I can get it other times it is so cool, when I do, but other time I no do so I let her know to try again but if not able to read her lips to body language to figure out the word she trying to let me know then she write it down that is only time  when I can see it then I say it in her world way of life. But sometimes I am not able to say the word because I not learn it & then have to go to word I remember to say like me going to ryme it to word I know to try to learn to say the word is a lot of work I do just to do the word right in the hearing then I have to learn the meaning of it to saying it. To then try to understand it with so many things to do for one word is alot of work I do just to get the word and it is a big WOW. YOUR HEARING WORLD I HAVE TO DO SO MUCH WORK ON ONE WORK TO GET IT AND SAY IT AND UNDERSTAND IT THEN I LUCKY IF I REMEMBER HOW TO SAY IT AGAIN, BUT ALOT OF TIMES I JUST LET IT GO FOR THAT TIME IN THE DAY BECAUSE SO MUCH MORE TO DO IN DAY TIME UNTIL SLEEP. BUT ON THE HOUR OF DAY I NOT DO THEM THE SAME AS HEARING PEOPLE DO IN LIFE. I do it in ways of when my soul of who me is as the soul me is in the body I live in to thinking of in mind other different things with God to. Then it to what the body me incan work to do and do for me in this hearing world life I live in pain to feel the body hurt a lot and broke down on me to hard to breathe to get on machine to breathe. But it not good or ok and if things smell to hurt this body then I on machine to medicine doctors help me for this body, to I do them but when machine not working I go to doctors of specialist who know about body to help me in this life they show proof of paper to machine show what is wrong with body to I do what they say and what they show me to do and now body do ok sometime. But soul good just body not all time works right in disabilities cultutre life I have to live in. Then sometime they have to put me on the table to cut inside this body to fix it. But God my Father he comes to me and talks to me to be ok and sometime holds my soul body to out of the other body go dead in the hearing world but he makes me go back because he say my job not done and the people need to see me to know the things I do in they world, they way, so I can live life in it.They seeing me in there world of life to they no want to be in my life is why they no call me or come back, and if I call them and nothing happen, I just let it go, but when I find out JB still alive my heart exploded to joy to know JB back in my life to know my past and yes people touch me but that is not how I see things in my life. In my life to meeting people in so many different ways they not see real me on true life I live in your hearing world, there are all diiferent things go by me plus people are different to some walk to me and touch me body to do things to it they way of life to rape me to me not to say and leave me home sometime ask why you did that and other time not say a word because so affraid to get beaten to dead and people has done this to me but they yes in their eyes they not do but they do know they did it just lie about it to not get in trouble. But they know who they are and me know and God our father he know to. I do forgive them as a person, because  God say to do, but on the things they do I not for give them never, but remember it always to say them out and if people ask me, I say true to them, and tell them the on way it happen to word of things of what happen, but I no make up words to meaning like in hearing world people can, this why people not understand my words to me type this to show you true me is the best way I can and pray you not take me out of my home and say in your world god and bad things about me. Of things in life to my world and culture is not my way of things it is to the way of the body me in to things to keep it live so me is on this earth to land to my apartment to me in this electric wheelchair to show my life is who me is not what you all think it is. But people do different things when their first meet me and some are nice, some are cool people to see, children see me more on little one to say hi, look way, because they scare and not know what to say or if it ok with mom and that is the time when each soul will make up on mind to see then to do and say to real life of things in the hearing world of each culture life we live in the bodies god put us in for this time in this world before he let you travel to different alien to human to etc. To some people touch me in ways to come fast at me hurts to things like they fall on me or wheelchair over them and they come so fast I not see until after things happen but sometime not ask and just do it in your way to kiss me or hug me but my world to kiss on cheek and a hug to nothing more from now on.This is only things can happen and only person will be able to touch me as man and wife is when JB and me decide on things in hearing way of life to do and if we can be together in God’s world the way God My Father say. I be true for this man & I no want to tease people or lie to people because it is not good to do. I only live my life day to day. time to time in the seconds of one day each I wake up to, no words in between. I no go around brush,because I no have the time for it. ok. My life I live to no can hear sound. only can see people faces from up close where people face I see in person is no words to only your face and it is the best part of you. In my eyes. ok. I am only true and see life as it is nothing more. But now in my future I want to be Johnny B. wife I not know his whole name right now but I am praying for him & want to do things different in your hearing world if you let me do so I can take my last name Powmacwizalord as last name. So JB can be the first man & me as his wife name in the hearing world. It will be so cool and God our Father say it is ok to do. But to when it happens me still on hold he has to still get well and me is very sick to and living life with different disablilities in one body is so hard. It is not easy for me and I work very hard to get in this wheelchair to be safe to type to a friend to not feel so alone in my silent world. yes it is a honor to talk to you and to dream to hope on things to when we both can do things together so it could happen. I try to eat food on one dish to sometime lucky to get it down and other times not able to eat the food because it hurt my stomach in because I got a disease it in so not able to eat like hearing world people can. they took it down fast to gone like superman in my life. Some people not know me or come in my life but now I hoping this email letter will help you to see true me so you can see a lot of things happening around me to where you see that I no can to what you to hear, to see, other with walk beside my wheelchair is cool, plus to talking to if you around me now you will see Cojack Artalejina Powmacwizalord she is my iguana and is a lady and she 4 years old to 46 inches long and help me on sounds in your hearing world when me around her to her doing body language and I raise her as the same as you raise your children in your home to good things in life and I make sure that when she is not scare because if scared she turns pink color on her nose. But it on body skin if it turn pink to things she hearing it to people fight to hit each other or to yelling, loud, she show me when she turns pink on skin when I go to her and calm her down and tell her what it is and let her know she is safe with me. When people mean to jealious I try to not let them be to excuss true words of what happen some listen and some not and that why people do and say words wrong to hurt each other, 2 wrongs no make it right only makes trouble we all no need to do in life but people not happy so I see you look mean to me or I seen angry, to mean things they do to just words they say to hurt your feel to make you feel like nothing or to not can handle true things in life so they say it not true or it a lie and that is wrong to do. But on this computer opens a path to a way I can talk to a soul but not see body, to a computer to no one come and where we just typing on computer to computer or my computer to their cell phone But when they see me in this wheelchair to not able to hear them to me not able to walk. Some say they no care, some say not matter if ok, to different things it so confessing sometimes and then I no get it. smile.
 I understand people need you to hear them and listen to them and things me not able to do in this life to deaf silent world but I can listen to your soul to see you and learn who you are so you can know who I am and for people who need it. I am sorry I never be able to hear but God our Father so cool he make it so I had voice to learn it in your hearing world to feel my voice to bring out the words but on high and low to yelling I no can hearing and that is when people have to help me put my voice the right way to bring out word nice to not wrong way when you hear my voice. I see my son some times but every time when he stand in front of me it is so beautiful to me. I am so proud he in my life but on things he do his business to his life in hearing world and it so cool to see his face, smile, body to good and bad feelings to dirty clothes or smell smokes of things he smoke. So I make him spray to things to make sure I can be close to him but if the cigg. smell so bad I tell him, he stay away from me or takes a shower to clean clothes to give me a hug and kiss on cheek to show he happy to see me and love me and it is so cool but sometimes times I no see him where he is busy on his life to people he talks to.  My phone not same phone as his but that ok because thank to pople who make machine to buy to give to help me in my life to this computer to the TTY machine, but people in past life has taking it away from me. People not let me see Christopher to no more can call to if phone on hearing line they say it to me but sometimes make it up to think it to do in there world to take as a joke they say but I no see it that way only see it in the way they did it and it done and you not able to change it because it happen. But you can make it up to do the right things on letting a person know if joke or not but is still a mean things to do to a person wanting know that their child on phone or not or ok on how people do on me I not able to change it all but it happen. I needed to know he still live but true life to seeing him face in person is so beautiful to this feeling inside heart to soul feel like magic God make are body to do and this is heaven in my eyes to see my son in front of me and to not knowing my son as a hearing person I not know but his soul I know and that is where I see my baby who is alive to living in this world it means so much to me on things I see Chris do. For 8 years I not able to know my son alive. But in that time Chris had a son CJ. I not get to see my grandson born and wish I would have. But my world me the last person or lucky if me get to know things that happen in my life ok. I am close off from the world to live in silent every second minutes in a day of time. Can you live a life like I do? Well this is me, as you may see now do you want to really get to know me? Well, all I can say is my soul is who I am and live in this body to me being in your hearing world and doing the best me can to me able to say I am doing it. Iam in love with JB,  This man I love to high heaven. I pray you all forgive me and still be my friends. But it is your choice to decide on what you want and in your life. I understand this, but Johnny B. is the man I love with all my heart. I am so sorry. I fall in love to this person and I no can change it. ok. God Bless you all and I pray for things in your life to be beautiful But From now on from today on I will never will let no one touch me only him. ok. Please understand and you all are important to to me is why I write this so you see me.
Thank you for listening out of the time of day you have. My love as a friend to you all will stay true to you if you still want to talk or see it but it only can be as a friend to no more. God Bless and keep safe to making your life special to things you need in this life. Mind to grow in knowledge to making our world safe. It is very important to our children and love ones. You all are special in my life and very important to me as a friend and me is so lucky to have the honor to type to you in my day of time so you see me.
Peace out,
Stormaliza Beautispella Powmacwizalord

On Feb 2013 I find out the man me was waiting for lie to me and not care and hurt me to make body go in asthma attack to find out he no want to be with me. So me single to enjoying life and people new around me and trying to heal to blood clots to heart in body but life so precious and God shows this every day of our live to see things head on and to learn to make new things in life special and fun to smile and shine in God Eyes. Just need to watch out for them demons to do bad things on you to over come them is hard but the blessing of Jesus and God makes life heaven to shine in heart to smile all day. To where God gives us so much and in out minds to the holy spirit put things in mind is a blessing to make mind grow to knowledge to history you make it of your own. Share life with a friend to make a family is God shining in your heart to smile like sunshine to no one can take away from you and that what makes life heaven to show your heart to who you are is only way to show who I am. Stormaliza